I can't pretend to care as much about art and music as much as I used to. I have been putting everything I got into that for years and it has given me very little in return. I also find that I don't have the physical or emotional resources for certain friendships anymore. It's really sad and hard to do, but I don't think friendships are meant to be worth going out of the way for. Friendships should adapt to your life, you shouldn't change your life to accomodate friendships.
Of course I still enjoy making art and making music. I always have. The difference with my life now is, I don't identify as an artist so desperately anymore. I don't have to consistently "prove" to the world that that's what I am. I know that's what I am, I don't have to strive to exist in that light, in that context anymore. It's a tempting but ultimately hopeless thing to aspire to be as a young adult. A number of factors have made me "unsuccessful" at this, especially the vague parameters of what "successful" is. Does anyone want to see my Bandcamp stats? I'll show you.